Every Mother’s Day May Not be Happy – But the Memories Are

We’re still continuing the guest posts while I’m in Malawi, Africa building homes. Today, my friend Sidney from Hysterical Mom is sharing how Mother’s Day has changed since she lost her mom this year. While the day may have come and gone, we can’t forget how hard it is for some of our friends who no longer have their mothers, and mothers who no long have their children. The memories may be sweet, but sometimes getting TO those memories can be hard. Please welcome her. 

I had the honor and privilege of celebrating my mother on Mother’s Day from 1974 until 2014. My mother made her transition in 2015 before Mother’s Day. I did not think I would ever have to face this day. I cannot believe it has been 40 days since she was here.

Back in 2010, I wrote this (http://hystericalmom.net/give-me-butterflies) in dedication to her. I wanted to do what she always said to do, give people their flowers while they are alive to enjoy them. I wanted her to know how much she was loved. Because she was. More than she could ever know.

And now she is gone. And I don’t know what to do. This is my first motherless Mother’s Day and I don’t know what to do. I am a mother myself and the idea of celebrating motherhood escapes me. My children want to celebrate the mother I am and I am working hard to not be a blubbering mess for the mother I lost.

But what good does that do either of us? I am not the only one dealing with a loss. My children lost their grandmother, which is huge in itself.  So what do we do? We STILL celebrate the woman who helped me be the mother I am. The sister I am. The friend I am. The woman I am.

I had the honor of speaking at my mother’s memorial service. It took me a while to put into words the best way to describe who my mother was to so many people. Here is what I finally came up with, which made perfect sense…

My mother was a song. A soothing lullaby. A powerful symphony. A sexy love song. A hot dance beat.

Her words, strung together in harmonies of love, made the entire world sing.

Her song is one we will all remember forever.

She spoke life into everyone she came in contact with. You knew your life changed upon meeting her.

She would encourage you to reach out and touch someone’s hand and make this world a better place if you can.

She would not stand for any controversy, because with her it was always a family affair.

She is the joy inside my tears.

 

My mother was a butterfly, soaring on the winds of the world; leaving a trail of beauty and love wherever she went. I strive to be like her as I grow into this new normal.

I miss you mommy……so very much. But I know you are out there, somewhere, smiling and sending me butterfly kisses as only you can.